Philandering

Why Not

2009-07-26T21:33:00.001-05:00

Why not philander?

As a guy I am so tired of the same thing. I know her inside and out.

Whine and complain all day long. At least she has something to do.

Finding Someone

2008-09-08T20:45:00.001-05:00

Finding someone is not as easy as it used to be.

I would gladly fuck around.
Life without sex is not fun.

Marriage is hell.
Why did I ever do this.

A Poem of What was life

2008-09-08T20:40:00.003-05:00

Many things have happened . . .

none of the good . . .

they change a person . . .

i have changed.

When once i was full of dreams . . .

and passion . . .

and life . . .

and eagerness.

Now I see only darkness . . .

feel only pain . . .

and am so tired.

Tired of trying . . .

of trying . . .

of dreaming . . .

of being the person

Many come . . .

promising words . . .

hopeful expressions . . .

words of encouragement . . .

some want to fix the broken.

It is cold.

dark.

the head hurts.

the heart aches.

Deeply have i given . . .

nothing held back . . .

a piece is taken . . .

a chunk removed . . .

whittled away . . .

left to wither.

Till nothing is left . . .

a private hell . . .

a quite aching . . .

darkness covers what is left.

Is he still a person that once was . . .

the manners he holds . . .

the dignity that is shown . . .

the goodness that is done.

It remembers not so long ago . . .

full of hope . . .

full of promise . . .

full of life . . .

full of dreams . . .

full of strength.

To once again dance the dreams . . .

to dance for life . . .

to dance of hope.

yet here he is.

numb

broken

hurt

Why Should I not

2008-02-12T22:01:00.003-06:00

I know this sounds bad.

I am ready to do it again. I know I promised. I am just so #)(%#() bored with man on top get it over with quick.

I am sick of being told I suck and that she wants someone badly, to take away her being lonely.

Hell what does she thing. I have been feeling that for years. Like twenty of them.

I may have found someone to play with. I mean maybe a regular fuck buddy.

Why Should I Stay

2007-10-22T13:47:00.000-05:00

I always wonder, why should I not cheat?

I mean sex is dull and boring at home. I enjoy sex and cannot get the fun at home.

I really want to leave, but alas I am a coward.

Why Would I Cheat

2007-10-03T22:03:00.000-05:00

I have to confess that part of the problem is that . . . I enjoyed cheating. Shagging a differing women with differing responses is fun.

Not to mention there are things that many will do that a nearly dead fish will not. I have done bondage, oral, kinky things and lots of fun. The good news is that I have never caught anything bad.

Cheating is a rush in and of itself. I mean it is a high that will make anyone scream.

But it is acceptance. I am not the person who my wife thinks I am.

To her I am the nice boy. the good (okay) Christian man. The former pastor, the Bible teacher. The guy who said adultery is wrong. And it is wrong. I would prefer not to do it. I wish sexual satisfaction would come from the home.

I am a Slut

2007-10-01T19:36:00.001-05:00

I am a 79% slut. I am actually proud of this.

Why Write one Philandering

2007-10-01T19:23:00.000-05:00

This is a good question. The bottom line is that, I like it. I have slept around so many times on my spouse that it is really bad.

So for those of you who think I am horrid. it is even worse.

At one point I was a church member. Not a small church that you can dismiss, but a strong conservative Evangelical Church.

Of course the next hard part is that I was a pastor.

I write this not because I have demons. I am writing this so people may understand what is behind this.

First Post

2007-10-01T18:59:00.001-05:00

First Posting